Am I still dreaming?

Ever take a moment to sit back, look at your life and think "is this for real?"....I've been doing that A LOT lately. We moved into the house that we built from the red dirt up & I can't believe I am typing this from inside the wooden planks that we wrote our family verses on before the dry wall went up. I love knowing that underneath these walls there are promises permanently written on the foundation of this home. I love that we claimed this as a CHRIST CENTERED HOME. Walking through our front door and knowing that Ephesians 3:20 is right over our heads is a physical reminder of how we got here today. Not by our "good works" because we all know we fail over and over again. Not because we have good careers. Not because of US. Not at ALL. We are here because GOD can do MORE than we can EVER ask, think or imagine. He is GOD and HE is all we need. I love knowing that the room my daughter sleeps in is in a room surrounded by Jeremiah 29:11 written on the walls. God has the perfect plan for her future. I love that Proverbs 31 is written in our room, along with 1 Corinthians 13:4-8- I strive to be THAT wife. The wife Christ wants me to be. The mom that I was destined to become. My marriage is focused around God's definition of love & the fact that we can strive towards HIS perfect love every day--knowing that we will never come close to realizing what it is but also knowing that we can try harder and harder, day after day, to love like He loves. I love this life.

Take this Sunday, sit back, think about how far God has brought you and how much farther He is about to take you. We all have stressors, hardships, failures, difficulties & regrets--but get over them. I know, I know..easier said than done...but c'mon! It is one heck of a beautiful day out, you're breathing, God is present & He is ready to take you from HERE and push you on the journey to THERE. And once you get THERE...you won't believe where the next stop may lead you.

The past few years I've made it a point to live in the moment, appreciate the NOW, become excited for the THERE and open my arms up and let God be God and let Him lead me. It sure hasn't been easy..but gosh darnit has it been worth it. Who knows, maybe you will put up your arms in full surrender, receive the promise of Ephesians 3:20....and move from the ocean to OKLAHOMA! (Yea..I wouldn't have believed it 5 years ago either if you told me that would happen to me)...but I wouldn't have this life any other way.

C'mon--take the step of faith. ;)

-Megan

{{sneak peak at the interior of our home....CANT WAIT TO POST A HOME TOUR!!!}}

This past week...

Wow has it been one heck of a week....last Thursday we had to say "see ya later" to our loving dog, Valor. Hadley has a dog allergy....and after eliminating everything else that we could think of to prove that it wasn't the dogs...we failed and alas, dogs it was. She went to an awesome family and I know she's happy there. We miss her and are still sad, but each day it gets better. Seriously, who would have thought it was so hard to give up a dog? Honestly, I knew it would be hart but not as hard as it was....thankfully, we know the family and know that she is in good hands.

We didn't have much time to really be sad about missing Valor though because Friday morning Hadley woke up in the worst mood EVER. Now, if you know this girl, you know that she is one smiling, laughing, happy baby...so the fact that she was screaming her beautiful little head off was super out of the norm! She had a 102 degree fever so off to the doctors we went....that doctors visit was interesting...they left us in the room for 45 minutes (GOSH!) so...we had fun...well, anything to keep Hadley's mind happy. She ripped something off the wall (oops..), slapped something off the mirror (oops squared) and shredded the paper on the exam table (triple oops)...that will teach the doctor to never leave us in there that long again!! Well..doc came in...examined H...and diagnosed her with Hand, Foot and Mouth disease then proceeded to tell me that it will get LOTS worse before it gets better...exactly what I wanted to hear.

So, from then to now (7 days..) we have been switching shifts between my mom, travis and I taking work off. Sleep is tough, watching her in pain is so heartbreaking it makes me sick to my stomach. Thankfully, today when we went to the Pediatrician they told us that her Hand, Foot, Mouth disease is pretty much gone...but now....there's Salmonella in the mix. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! Is what I wanted to say...but instead..I just took a deep breath and immediately started asking God to heal her. I knew something was going on because I changed about 17 dirty diapers, steam cleaned poop off the carpet, mopped it off the floor, and did 4 loads of laundry in the span of 2 hours this morning. Now, she is cuddling on her dad, lots of butt paste on her little bum, and hopefully able to keep some fluids in long enough to hydrate tonight..otherwise it's back to the docs/ER we will go.

I took a trip to Target once Travis got home this afternoon (my every other day trip)....while I was driving I just turned the music off, asked God to heal my baby and just sat and listened...I was waiting to her Him. I have spent so much of this week praying to God and ASKING Him to heal my daughter but I haven't even sat down and shut up to listen. What is wrong with me? Am I really that selfish? God watched His son suffer on the Cross and He was there with Him the entire way. He was patient. He was forgiving and He had grace. So what the heck is up with me ASKING God to do all these things when I can't even LISTEN to Him tell me that it's going to be OK? I've wasted so much stress ASKING and if I would have just sat and LISTENED 7 days ago..who knows..this post may be totally different.

I heard Him. I heard Him tell me "Megan..I've got you this far. Why do you think I'm leaving you now? I got you. I've got Hadley. It's going to be fine. She's in good hands."

I don't know about you, but as a parent, I struggle with remembering this ^ the most. I just want my baby to feel better- I sit and cry with her- I feel sick to my stomach so often when she's screaming her lungs out in pain- and the entire time I look up to the sky and ask God to heal her. But what I should be doing, is look at my baby- covered by His grace, embraced with His love, protected by His promise...and be thankful that He's got it covered. I can only do so much. I can love on her. I can offer her the best nutrition possible but I can't snap my fingers and heal her...God can and God will.

Here's to knowing that God is on the scene. Here's to knowing that He does the impossible. Here's to understanding that everything is in His plan. and Here's to recognizing that we have 2 ears and 1 mouth- because listening to Him is twice as valuable as asking, asking, asking. 

Sorry for the ramble. Maybe it helps you. Maybe it doesn't. If anything, it gave you 30 seconds to think about something. Those 30 seconds are pretty darn valuable in this busy paced lifestyle...no?

Stand.

"You gave me breath so I could breath. Your great and matchless name all my days all my days. So let my whole life be a blazing offering. A life that shout and sings the greatness of our King!"

I took a day off today...to study. One day, my days off will be all about taking Hadley on fun mommy/daughter dates but until then, gotta do what I gotta do.

Anyways....

Our church has started this series called STAND, it's about standing out instead of blending in and being the light in this dark world. It's only been one week into the series and I love it. It's so relevant for today's world. Just going through work yesterday and reflecting on it during my [short] drive home made me realize that I had some opportunities to stand (and I did), other opportunities that I didn't recognize in the moment but in hindsight thought to myself "hmmm...I probably should have said something there..." and I'm sure there were moments that I still haven't recognize that maybe I should  but still cant think of them. Stand up for what? Well, stand up against negativity, stand up against talking about someone...you know, regular day to day stuff in this world.

Back in January we picked our one word for the year. My word was INTENTIONAL. I want to be more intentional with my mornings and spending my first few minutes with God, I want to be more intentional with our friends (even if it only means 10-15 minutes of saying "hi" because of our crazy schedules), more intentional about what I am eating, more intentional about what is heard around our house (we've been so WEIRD that we cut our cable and the TV is only on about a half hour a day..if that) and in addition to other items of my life that I am working on being more intentional with....I am adding "be more intentional about standing up and standing out".

I'm sure I'm not the only one that can find ways in my every day life where a simple "no" or a U-turn out of a conversation can do wonders to stand out. We're only given a limited amount of words, time, and breaths in this world. I don't know about you, but I want to use them to make a difference. To stand out in the crowd. I want to show my daughter that the world doesn't expect us to be lights and doesn't want us to be different and that showing them the unexpected is what makes life worth living. We spend our entire childhood/teen/young adult years trying to blend in...it's stupid! We weren't made to blend in, God didn't create us to conform to the ways of this world. That's EASY. We were made to overcome challenges. Only by being challenged is when we truly grow and discover what we are capable of. 

I hope you can think of some situations each day or week that you encounter in which you can now remember the beauty of NOT blending in but instead stand out and let God do His work through you in that situation. 

Well, that's my ramble for the morning. Time to get some studying done and enjoy this cup of coffee.

-M


Song of the morning: "Glory to God Forever" by Fee

HKS: 4 months!

Age: 4 months. (On July 9...)

Weight: 12.5 lbs

Length: 25 1/2 inches

Milestones: Hadley rolled over at 3 1/2 months! She's a rolling machine--loves to be on her tummy now. She also talks up a storm- i love it. She grabs onto things and knows what she wants..exactly when she wants it. 

Sleep: Pretty well..in bed by 7:30PM....maybe up once during the night but more often then not she sleeps through the night.  

Best moment: smiles. her laugh. her smiles. her laugh. ;)

Health: She's doing great. On 100% formula..tried some Rice Cereal the other day...she's not too sure about it. 

Things to remember:

-She loves her bouncer! 

-She did her first painting at day care!

-They call her the greeter at day care because every time someone walks in she smiles at them haha

-She started drooling like crazy..hello teething! She loves her teething toys. 

Little Miss Hadley, we love you so much!

Hadley Kaye: 3 Months

Age: 3 months. 

Weight: No clue....but if I had to guess...I would say close to 11 lbs

Length: Don't know...but she's more than 22 1/2 inches (since that was her length at 2 months) She's getting too long for her newborn insert in her bath tub though- she has some long legs like her mommy. she is perfect.

Milestones: this girl found her feet and her hands. she loves them. she's always trying to grab her feet and if there's not a bottle or pacifier in her mouth, her hands are there. she smiles all the time- i love it. her neck is doing a great job holding up her head. She's holding things more and more and it's so exciting! She's a laugher and a talker....she's perfect. 

Sleep: AMAZING! Off to bed by 830/9pm....wakes up at 5AM!! :) 

Best moment: smiles. all day, every day. 

Health: She's doing great. We're making the transition to 100% formula (HAL-LEH-LUH-YUH for ME!). So far so good w/ 50/50...let's hope it keeps up. 

Things to remember:

-She loves her activity gym!

-Car rides=naps

-She loves getting out. No matter where we are...she just strolls in her BOB and takes in the scenary. 

-She's a cuddle bug. I love it.

-She's starting to sleep flat on her back during nights...still in a rock n play at night.

-Still in that darn swaddle. She loves it. I sleep. We love it & don't feel bad about it.

-She is getting better at this whole tummy time thing.

-She never used to like the bath..but now we get a confused look...which is better than a cry....progress! 

Hadley Kaye, you make my life so complete. I love you love bug! 

This girl has some long legs like her mommy.

It takes a village, a little bit of coffee and a whole lot of Jesus

{{Love our family. 05.10.14.}}

From years before we were pregnant we knew how important it was to root our children in the church right away. My husband and I both have amazing parents that lead us towards God in everything we did and we prayed for Hadley's relationship with God before we were even pregnant. I always talk about how this move to Oklahoma was 100% God ordained and I'm going to say it again--We are here for a reason & God knew exactly what He was doing when He moved us here. We LOVE our church. We love it's values. We love that we feel 100% comfortable allowing them to impart wisdom onto the most precious gift we have ever received, our daughter.  

I loved hearing my parents ask God to give them the wisdom to be the best grandparents in the world. I loved hearing our good friends praying over our family and reminding us that what they love about us is that we aren't afraid to share our relationship with God. I loved hearing our other good friends pray for guidance and blessings over our family of 3. I loved hearing one of the pastors at the church (and also our friend) pray for Travis and that he will lead like he's never lead before. I feel that these people, these prayers, this support system, is God ordained. God placed these people into Hadley's life for a reason. I am so excited that there is a team of God loving people surrounded around Hadley and I can't wait to see what God's plans are for her life. I know they will be amazing. 

It truly takes a village. I was in tears listening to my parents and our close friends pray for us raising Hadley and for her to constantly seek Him. That's why i'm here--I'm here to bring her closer to Christ. Not only her, but everyone I encounter--I am here to bring PEOPLE closer to Christ. Life changes when we look at it from that perspective. We're not here to travel the world for our own pleasure and we're not here to be the boss at work--we're here to lead others towards Him. Some of us get the great opportunity to travel the world to lead those in less fortunate countries towards God, but all of us have the opportunity (and I'm even going to go as far and call it an ORDER) to bring those that we encounter every day towards Him. Our ONE purpose in this life is to lead others towards Christ. While we are called to lead others towards Christ remember that there's a village surrounding you to keep you motivated, to keep you on track and to keep you focused on Him. 

Whatever you're facing, weather you're a new mom, a future mom, a wife, an employee, a manager, a daughter--know that you need God. We all need God. It takes a group of God fearing, faith filled, truth centered people to help each other thrive. Surround yourself with people that build you up. Trust God that He has put incredible plans in place for your life. Know that everything we do is a blessing from Him. 

We might get tired. Work may be exhausting. It won't always be easy, but He promised it would be worth it. So, grab your support group, pray for strength, sip on some coffee and know that God is on the scene and when He is present, NOTHING is impossible. 

So, that's my thought for today. Whether it's raising a child, being an outstanding spouse or friend, it takes a village. We might need a little bit of coffee along the way but we will always need a whole lot of Jesus. 

Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

{{On the way to her dedication.}}

{{Some of the decorations I put together.}}

{{A pasta salad my mom made. We also had grilled steak, salmon, and asparagus.}}

Over & Out,

M

Hadley is 2 months old!

Hadley is 2 months old today. I love this little girl so much. She has made our life so complete. 

Age: 2 months. 

Weight: 9 lb 10 oz

Length: 22 1/2 in

Milestones: she started recognizing colors and not just black and white, she talks A LOT (and by talk I mean coo's and making interesting noises), she smiles when her dad and I talk to her, she LOVES her activity gym (so much so that she "yells" at us to put her in it). Side note: it's pretty neat how we can tell different screams/cry's and what they mean).  She's lifting her head and moving it around and looks around with her big beautiful blue eyes a lot. 

Sleep: She's sleeping beauty. We go to bed by 10pm, wake up at 2:30AM, feed her, go back to bed at 3:30AM and are feeding her again before we leave for work at 6AM. It's a pretty neat system. She's had a couple of nights where she slept straight thru to 4:30AM (which is when Travis and I wake up for work) so that was pretty awesome. She's up more during the day which took us a little bit to get used to because we used to get stuff done while she was sleeping during the day..haha but it's so much fun to play with her more. 

Best moment: listening to her laugh and smile at us. perfect. 

Health: She's been doing very well. She's on mainly breastmilk now and I've been sick all last week and as difficult as it was, I had to stay away from her to make sure I didn't get her sick. 

Things to remember:

-Hadley LOVES to play. All day! It's so cute. 

-She loves her massages at night. 

-She's getting better in the car seat in the car. 

-That Pacifier..i tell ya..she loves it. I think it has to do with comfort from when she was in the NICU and they gave it to her. 

-Still not a fan of tummy time...at all. 

-She loves Row Row Row your boat and Baby Einstein

(before the dreaded shots...)