This has been on my heart all week..shoot, for the past couple of years, hope it doesn't dig into you too much (or actually, maybe it will & maybe it will transform you). Who knows, but here we go.
Have you seen those "Dear so-and-so" blogs that people have been putting out? Well, think of this as being written to the girl struggling to fit in, the girl struggling to find her spot....it's real and I think it's a lot more prevalent than we may think.
We've grown up learning about the difficulty women have had trying to "prove" themselves, blend into society, pursue education and have opinions that matter. And now, here we are...often times feeling like we're still in the corner. Not because we're females, at least, I don't think that's why. Mainly because there's "always someone better" and you can no longer be the one people rely on. No? Is it just me that feels like this? .........Ok..that's what I thought..moving on..
Can I get real with you for just a minute? This feels pretty dang familiar. I received a Master's degree at 24 years of age...20-freaking-4! To top that off--my grades/thesis weren't to shabby either. I think i'm a kind person, I mean, we all fall short but hey, I'm aware of it and try to better myself each and every day. I pray for people, I hurt with people, I cry with them, celebrate with them....so what is missing? Why do we, why do I, feel SO STINKING INCOMPETENT at times?!
Answer: Perhaps we're selfish & want to know all the answers & can't bear to have this reputation ALL the time?
This is a fast paced world. We climb a ladder that will never bring us to the top. We bust our butts to just find out we didn't bust them enough. Shoot, sometimes, we can just walk into a room and instantly loose credibility for just being us and having a gosh darn smile on our face! Instead of letting this change who we are, instead of being selfish and complaining about it (guilty right here), what if we just kept doing what we're doing?
What if this world started to have women who KNEW they were AWESOME and kept trucking no matter what? I am who I am. If you don't like it--don't like me. That's OK. Our human selfish characteristics can take that bruise but what our emotions can't take (on our own) is the constant bruising from trying our best and still being beaten up--we need to rely on Him.
I know that God sends challenges our ways to watch us overcome them and prevail but we also need the knowledge to differentiate between a Godly challenge and Satan's attack. Satan attacks where we think we are the strongest. I think his thoughts go a little something like this..."Pshh!- you 20-something with A,B,and C--you watch, I'll take out A and let your discouraged attitude ruin B and C on your own." Unfortunately, we get this thought that we aren't qualified enough and Satan starts winning that battle.
Truth of the matter is: you are freaking awesome. God looks at you in some situations and says "Hey there, my 20-something, I've blessed you with A, B and C, but I think you can really excel in A so i'm going to throw this at you, watch you grow, and then once that pillar gets stronger, we will be beefing up B and C to catch up."
No one knows your story better than you. No one knows how strong you really are. No one knows about those nights you stayed up all night learning differential equations because you just HAD to score above all the boys (and let's face it...all the other girls) in the class. No one understands how FAR you have come except for those that were up to nothing good right there with you many years ago. No one knows the pain you have felt when your expectations were sky high but when the words came out of your mouth the only response you got was a group of people making THAT face. No one knows better than you. Never give in to these attacks.
Always look for the growth. And, c'mon, not everyone is going to appreciate you, but that's OK...as long as you're following God's promises then everything is A-OK.
He doesn't call the qualified, He qualifies the called. So get ready to get dirty, get ready to dive in, get ready to get bruised a little bit, and get ready to respond to God's challenges and to tell Satan's attacks to "shove it".
There you have it. Pre-7AM thoughts scattered all over this little digital page.
-M
